Dealing With Rejection

Rejection: the dismissing or refusal of a proposal, idea, etc. Quite a broad definition wouldn't you agree? Rejection can come in many different ways, whether its a job you didn't get or getting over a break up, its an inevitable part of life. It's universal and we all go through it at some time or another. Its a direct blow to the ego and its not fun its painful. My most recent form of rejection was from a job I didn't get. This was really recent, it was yesterday. Most of the time you can tell straight away how the conversation is going to go. Call it an inkling, and then you just wait for the inevitable words "I'm sorry but on this occasion you were unsuccessful". Then come the rush of emotions and thoughts which range from 'I knew it' to 'what was the point?'. Such a rush of emotions that you don't know how to deal with it at first, mine resulted in anger I was in a bad mood all day. That did not help. It got me thinking about how to deal with rejection? We all go through it and even though the scenario may be different, the thoughts and feelings may be the same. The feelings of hurt, disappointment, anger and even feeling like a failure are all normal.

Don't take it so personally- This may sound silly if its a bad break up your going through, I mean how can you not take it personally? We suffer rejection because we feel emotionally attached, if there were no feelings it wouldn't hurt as much. Most of the time the rejection may come from no fault of our own, we don't know what goes through peoples heads or why they make certain decisions. So don't think it was all your fault or something you did. For example, with my job rejection, I'll never know exactly what the other candidate said to make the recruiter choose them, or what made them make their decision.

Wasn't the right fit- This really comes from actors and auditions, they go on many auditions and are often told they are not the right fit for the role. When it comes to job rejection I try and keep this in mind. Sometimes we are not the right fit or right person, again we probably won't know exactly why but try not to dwell on it too much. There the one's who are really missing out, not knowing how amazing we are.

Timing- Try and think of the bigger picture, there may be something better waiting for you. The timing might not be right now. We may find out the reasons for rejection later in time, we'll know the purpose of pain in due time.

You've done it before- Since we've been children there have been feelings of rejection. Sure they may be on a smaller scale but we've all been through it before. Its not the first or last time you will feel like this but you've beaten it before and came out stronger.

Chance to learn- Use this situation as a chance to learn and evolve. If it was a bad interview think about how and what you can do differently and work on for next time. Every experience is a chance to learn.

Mental cleansing- Am I the only one who thinks that when your in the shower, there's a mental cleansing that happens? I'm one of those people who when in the shower my brain rushes from subject to subject. Whilst washing my hair I run through in my mind some of the things that I'm going through and almost use it as a way to wash away negativity. Afterwards I always feel better and ready to take on the world.

All this may not be what you want to hear when your in the eye of the storm and feeling crappy, but take the time to feel how your feeling and remember you will be fine.

What are some of the best ways you've dealt with rejection? Leave some of your tips in the comments and we can all help each other.


  1. I cope so well with rejection nowadays that it scares me a little! Having originally thought I wanted to be on a fashion team in a magazine, I toughened myself up in preparation and not much phases me now. I'm a huge advocate of the mental cleansing in the shower too ;) I even have a minature checklist that I run through when in the shower hahaha - water really calms and centres me. On a more serious note though, I usually cope with rejection by simply making plans to try again and push myself a little harder. I schedule in some time with my best friend or take a solitary walk by the lake and just remember that not everything is the right fit, and there's no point in wasting time on something that's wrong, right? ;) x

    1. That's great advice Michelle, I completely agree there's no point wasting time on something that's not right. I have a mental check-list too haha! Making plans is a great tip, it helps with moving onwards and upwards.

  2. Lovely advice throughout this post! I love it! I love the using the situation to evolve and that. I am a firm believer in what doesn't hurt you makes you stronger!


    1. Thank you Francesca, I'm a firm believer of that too.



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