When I was younger I had the majority of my life ahead planned out. I thought by 24 I'd have a good job, maybe my own place and I'd be a proper 'grown up'. Fast forward to now, a few weeks before my 24th birthday and life couldn't be more different. So here I am, 24th birthday looming, I live at home and my career is nowhere where I wanted it to be. The Friends theme song is very relevant to my life, "
your lifes a joke, your broke, your love lifes DOA" sound familiar?
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There's always a possibility. |
I feel like I did everything I was supposed to do, I had good grades throughout my education, went to university and got a good grade which I was proud of, and for a degree that I enjoyed. After university I suddenly faced so much rejection from jobs and felt a little lost. I carried on with the job I had during university and got an internship with a company in the field I wanted to work in which links with my degree. After a couple years the job rejection is taking its toll and working for free in an internship is drowning the soul. There is a part of me that thinks society places such a strong impact on 'go to university if you want a good job' this may have been true many years ago but not now. When my mother was my age she was married and had a house, whereas I'm part of the 24% of 20-24 year olds living at home. Don't get me wrong I quite enjoy living at home, but a do fear that owning a house one day will only be a dream and not reality.
I think societies views on what makes a proper 'adult' e.g a house, marriage, kids, is definitely why I don't feel like one. However with events and life experiences which happened during my teens I do feel like I have grown up quickly. Like many others I am constantly torn between the pressures of society and people around me. Questions such as when do I plan to get married not only evoke an eye roll, but also make me think when will society change its archaic views. No, I'm not married and no, I don't have my dream job, but does that make me less of a 'grown up' than my mother was at my age? Circumstances change,
hello recession but why don't our societies archaic views. Maybe our views have to change and not change ourselves. Maybe it's no longer a question of when will you get married, but would you want to?
Not only are people in our generation compared to those in past generations, those comparisons we can deal with. However, comparing ourselves to people we know similar in age or circumstance are when issues can arise. I admit to getting down when I think of my life compared to someone I know, and with social media almost being used as a bragging tool its hard not to. I think its important to remember that the path others have taken in life are not necessarily the same for you. Deep down you might not want the same as them and if you did have what they had what makes you think you would be happy? Remember people only share what they want to on social media. It's OK to feel a lost and confused about the future, my twenties so far have been the biggest transitional period in my life so far. I think the most important thing is to do what makes you happy. Don't try and conform or meet societies age goals. I personally don't think their relevant any more.
Age will always only be a number, I think its much more important to look at life experiences and maturity. I may not be conforming to societies age goals, or have a house and husband but its much more liberating to throw those age goals out the window.
After years of having my life planned out for me through education, after leaving it, I can say I'm still not entirely dealing with it that well. If I'm honest I don't know exactly what I want to do or have a five year plan, in fact a 5 month plan is daunting enough. Any plans I did have have been thwarted, that's life I guess. If you find yourself in a similar situation, try not to panic. Take a deep breath. Relax, the walls won't collapse around you. Do what you want to do, don't worry about society or any age goals. If you can't find what you want to do at some point you'll realise what it is.
I'd love to know some your thoughts.